Managing up might sound like corporate jargon, but it’s actually a superpower. As an individual contributor, it’s about building a better working relationship with your manager by understanding their goals, preferences, and challenges—and communicating in a way that makes their (and your) life easier.
But let’s talk about the tricky part: giving upward feedback. How do you tell your boss something isn’t working without stepping on toes, burning bridges, or feeling like you’re walking a workplace tightrope?
Spoiler: It’s totally doable—and when done right, it can make you the MVP of the team.
Why Bother Managing Up?
Think of managing up like tuning a guitar. When you and your manager are in sync, you make beautiful music together. When you’re not, everything feels off-key.
Providing upward feedback isn’t about critiquing your manager—it’s about creating a partnership that works better for everyone. A stronger relationship with your boss can mean clearer priorities, more support, and a team culture that feels less stressful and more productive.
Step 1: Know Your Manager’s Style
Every manager has quirks. Some love bullet points; others want a full backstory. Some thrive on regular check-ins, while others prefer to give you space to work independently.
The key to managing up? Understand how your manager operates.
Example:
Your manager, Kate, hates morning meetings and always seems rushed during 9 a.m. check-ins. Instead of assuming she’s uninterested, adapt:
“Hey Kate, I noticed our morning check-ins feel a bit hectic. Would it be more helpful to move them to the afternoon when things have settled down?”
Action Step: Pay attention to your manager’s habits, preferences, and communication style. Then, tailor your approach to match.
Step 2: Find the Right Moment
Timing is everything—especially when giving upward feedback. Your manager is human (shocking, I know) and likely juggling their own stressors.
Avoid dropping feedback in the middle of a crisis or during a high-stakes project. Instead, pick a time when things are calm, or schedule a one-on-one to ensure you have their full attention.
Example:
Imagine your boss keeps sending last-minute requests that derail your focus. Instead of venting in the moment, wait until your next check-in.
“I’ve noticed we’re getting a lot of last-minute requests, which makes it hard to prioritise tasks. Can we set up a system to flag urgent items earlier?”
Action Step: Be mindful of your manager’s workload and emotional bandwidth before diving into feedback. Be flexible to ask when would it be a good time to chat and schedule it in! Feedback is a two-way street.
Step 3: Frame It as a Partnership
Nobody likes feeling blamed or criticised—managers included. That’s why the way you phrase feedback matters.
Be clear, have examples and focus on collaboration. Frame your feedback as a shared effort to make things better for the team.
Example:
Instead of saying: “You don’t give clear instructions, and it’s frustrating.”
Try: “I want to make sure I’m delivering what you need. Can we clarify priorities for projects upfront?”
Action Step: Use “we” language to emphasise teamwork and shared goals.
Step 4: Be Specific and Solution-Oriented
Vague feedback is as useful as a map with no labels. If you’re going to bring up an issue, come prepared with examples and potential solutions.
Example:
Your boss constantly schedules meetings during your focused work hours.
“I’ve noticed our meetings often fall during my most productive work time. Could we experiment with scheduling them after lunch instead? That way, I can tackle my deep work in the morning.”
Action Step: Focus on what’s actionable. Highlight the issue, give examples, and suggest a fix.
Step 5: Show Empathy
Your manager has pressures you might not see—like juggling their own boss’s expectations or managing the entire team’s workload. A little empathy goes a long way in softening your feedback.
Example:
Instead of saying: “Why do you always change priorities at the last minute?”
Try: “I understand priorities can shift quickly. How can I help you anticipate changes so we can adjust more smoothly?”
Action Step: Acknowledge your manager’s challenges and position your feedback as support, not criticism.
Real Talk: What If It Doesn’t Go Well?
Sometimes, even the best-intentioned feedback doesn’t land as expected. If your manager gets defensive or brushes it off, don’t panic.
Here’s what to do:
- Reflect on delivery: Could you have been clearer or more tactful?
- Keep the door open: “I understand this might not be the right time. Let me know if you’d like to revisit this later.”
- Focus on what you can control: Keep doing your best work and revisit the conversation when the time feels right.
Build the Feedback Habit
Managing up isn’t a one-and-done task—it’s an ongoing practice. Start small and build your feedback muscle over time.
Try This Today: The ‘Feedback Journal’
- After meetings or key interactions, jot down notes: What worked? What felt off?
- Use these notes to identify patterns and prep for your next one-on-one.
Example:
“This week, I noticed you were pulled into a lot of last-minute meetings. I’d like to check if there’s a better way to communicate updates without interrupting your day.”
Final Thought: It’s a Two-Way Street
Managing up is about building a relationship where feedback flows both ways. When you approach it with curiosity, empathy, and a focus on solutions, you’re not just helping your manager—you’re creating a stronger, more effective team.
So go ahead, give that upward feedback a shot. You might just be surprised at how much it improves not only your work dynamic but your confidence as an individual contributor.
What will you try this week?
Tell us below. 👇
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